When life’s reality check comes calling, it is hard to get your head around it. Recovery is like one big reality check of waking up to what was going on while addiction was at the helm. Many people hold different versions of reality but accepting the true version of reality, by connecting all the moving parts, is how a person grows in recovery.
Giving up the veil of reality is helpful in making long-lasting, positive changes in recovery. Learn some ways to move forward if you are struggling with accepting reality and getting yourself clean and sober.
Acknowledge True Reality
Even though everyone has their version of reality, there is a reality, then there is a version of reality. Facing up to mistakes and challenges, or ways that you hurt people when addicted is hard, but if you accept where you are, you can move forward easier. You are able to make more amends that are accepted and embraced by loved ones. You can choose your dreams and work hard to achieve them. Reality is not some created concept, but it differs for each person. Trauma-informed care tells us that people who experience any type of trauma for any length of time, are experiencing altered reality as they know it. To get back to baseline is to never be able to be who they would have been without the traumatic experiences, but they can learn to live with who they are here and now and thrive in spite of the trauma. The same is for anyone who comes seeking support for addiction. Recovery is about acknowledging reality is hard, but there is more to live for than doing drugs and drinking and life can be great again.
Be Brutally Honest
When you admit you are not someone who has it all figured out, you have entered a new realm of recovery. Denying your current reality will not make it go away. Dealing with bad stuff is only a way to get to the good stuff but it is a step in the right direction. Radical honesty is about brutal honesty about all of the consequences, all of the lost possibilities, and everything in between. When you are honest, you have more room to improve. Brutal honesty looks like:
- Admitting wrongdoing
- Accepting responsibility for harm caused
- Making amends where due
- Working steps to achieve healing with others and yourself
A brutally honest approach to recovery means taking the time to do inventory and work the steps of honoring where you were and where you want to go. You cannot move ahead if you are stationed in the past, nor can you move ahead ignoring the reality of the present situation. Get out of your own head, seek help, and begin the journey of asking hard questions to find the truth and heal.
Know Your Role
When you accept reality, you take a good, long hard look at yourself and accept your role. To fully accept reality, it is important to acknowledge the good, bad, and the ugly. There will be some truly ugly parts, but without, there cannot be beauty. It is important to identify what you may have done to create space for personal success or failure. Once you know what you’re dealing with, you can work towards steps in healing. You are not perfect, nor is anybody else. Your role now is to accept where you are, today, and be present to healing as much as possible in the best way possible for you.
Release the Fear
Fear of the unknown can keep people locked in with addiction and the mindset that keeps people from thriving in recovery. Fear of what others think can get in the way of moving forward. People must be willing to do things the way they think is best for them but it means fighting your way through fear and finding hope in recovery.
The final way to accept your reality is to make a plan for reaching your goal. This should include steps to take that help create a new reality. When you break down this goal into small steps you can accomplish one at a time, it helps builds your confidence and self-worth for the long road ahead. Working with a core team of people who have your back is important. This includes therapists, healers, nutritionists, mental health professionals, trauma-informed specialists, and others who understand what you need to move forward in recovery. Reality is here, today, waiting for you to claim hope in recovery if you are ready to accept the call.
